


I Need a Boyfriend

by mitigates



Series: AU One Shots [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Akaashi might be psychic, Blind Date, Bokuaka - Freeform, FMA reference, Finding Love, KuroKen - Freeform, Kuroken is endgame, Kuroo and everyone, M/M, Social Anxiety, This is based off of a TikTok, daisuga - Freeform, dating app, kurodai - Freeform, kurolev - Freeform, kurotsukki - Freeform, levyaku - Freeform, lots of dating, no beta we die like daichi, one sex scene, what are tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:27:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26106445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mitigates/pseuds/mitigates
Summary: Akaashi’s eyebrows shot up slowly as he scrolled through the photos. “He looks like- boyfriend material. Husband material. But he also looks like the kind of guy who had unrequited feelings for his best friend all throughout high school and moved on about a month ago.”Kuroo eyes widened slightly. “That’s oddly specific.”Akaashi shrugged. “Swipe right.”So Kuroo swiped right.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Haiba Lev/Kuroo Tetsurou, Haiba Lev/Yaku Morisuke, Koutarou Bokuto/Keiji Akaashi/Koushi Sugawara/Daichi Sawamura, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Oikawa Tooru, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Series: AU One Shots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1824652
Comments: 18
Kudos: 151





	I Need a Boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on a TikTok lmao.

Kuroo sighed and leaned back in the large recliner that took up too much space in his living room. “I need a boyfriend-” He muttered, mostly to himself.

A crash, a bang, and a flurry of footsteps later: Bokuto appeared in the doorway to his room. “I thought you would  _ never _ ask!”

“I didn’t ask-” Kuroo started to reply, a glare settling onto his face, but it was useless.

Bokuto waved his hand and beamed his phone at Kuroo, earning a grunt from the dark-haired man as it hit him square in the chest.

“Bo- what the fuck!” Kuroo rubbed the sore spot and prepared to return the favor.

“Look at that app! It’s  _ way _ better than Tinder, and Grindr, Bumble, and POF or any of that other shit that I know you’ve used.”

“How do you know-”

“Bro, you were always on my matches.  _ Always _ . But I don’t want to make you choose between me and your future so I always swipe left.” Bokuto winked provocatively at Kuroo and the latter started regretting moving in with his best friend from high school. “This is where I found Kaashi.”

Kuroo hummed as he reluctantly started downloading the app on his own phone. If Bokuto managed to find the one person in the world that was willing to put up with him then maybe Kuroo could too. Granted, he personally refused to believe he could be as bad as Bokuto but seeing how long he had been single made him start thinking that he just might be the problem. 

The app downloaded quickly and Kuroo rolled his eyes as he put in his credit card information to start the “free” trial. Bokuto was obnoxiously close as he rested his chin on the back of the recliner and directed Kuroo which buttons to press. Kuroo sighed loudly and Bokuto took the hint, moving to the bed. Kuroo furrowed his eyebrows as he tried to choose which pictures to upload.

He held his phone out to Bokuto. “Which of-”

“Oh, I’m an expert- let me.” Bokuto snatched Kuroo’s phone and started scrolling through his selfies and pictures of him with friends. “This is a yes. This is a hard no. This is an absolutely not, nobody needs to know how many oreos you can fit into your mouth. Or well- I guess it could be a useful skill if the guy is packing-”

“Bokuto! Give me my fucking phone back.”

Bokuto laughed loudly as he uploaded the photos. 

Kuroo approved them and started his swiping. Bokuto was back over his shoulder again.

“Oh, he’s cute- oh, no? I guess not. Oh, hey he looks fun! No? Okay. Um, oh fuck is that a 12-pack? No? Not into it.” Bokuto frowned as Kuroo swiped right on every single person he passed. He didn’t even stop to do anything other than look at their profile photo. “Didn’t take you for someone so shallow, Tetsu.” Bokuto crossed his arms as he sunk into Kuroo’s bed, scowling disapprovingly at his best friend.

Kuroo glanced up at him and rolled his eyes. “I’m not shallow.”

“You’re only looking at their photo!”

“I am not!” Kuroo defended immediately. He was in fact not just looking at their profile photo. He had mastered the art of skimming and speed reading when he was still in high school taking college courses. “Most of these profiles that I’ve passed haven’t gone deeper than letting me know their cat's name. I don’t care what their cat's name is...well, at least not yet. I love cats. That’s not the point- I want to know about  _ them _ . I want to know-” Kuroo stopped swiping as one caught his eye. He looked familiar.

Bokuto bounded back toward him, sitting on the edge of the recliner. “Oh, he’s... _ handsome _ .”

Kuroo snorted and clicked on the profile. “Lev Haiba. He looks familiar, why does he look familiar?”

“He’s probably famous or something, he’s wearing a 6-thousand dollar watch.”

“How do you even know that?” Kuroo asked, eyeing Bokuto.

He simply shrugged. “Kaashi likes watches. He doesn’t have any nice ones, but he likes ‘em.”

Kuroo turned back to his phone, his thumb hovering over the screen as he debated which way to swipe. 

“Just go right, man. Why not take the chance? Go on 1 date with a few different guys and see which one you would want to go on a second date with.” Bokuto encouraged him excitedly, already thinking about the double dates they could go on in the future. 

“Akaashi was probably the first person you swiped right on.”

Bokuto scoffed. “He was not!”

Kuroo stared at him blankly, expression unchanging.

“He was the second person.” Bokuto finally responded, quietly.

Kuroo snorted in response and went back to staring at his phone. 

“Look- he’s rich, he will treat you right and buy you more hair products. Just swipe right.”

So Kuroo swiped right.

He paused again a few minutes later. He tilted his phone slightly so Bokuto could see. Bokuto let out a low whistle. “He’s  _ hot _ .”

“Who’s hot?” 

Bokuto fell off of the bed at the sudden intrusion. Akaashi sleepily wandered into Kuroo’s room, rubbing his eyes with his oversized sweater-clad hand. He yawned and side stepped Bokuto like his sitting on the floor was a daily occurrence (it probably was).

He pulled his glasses on and peered at Kuroo’s phone. “Hm, he's definitely hot. In a rugged boyfriend material and he’s probably a switch type of way.”

Kuroo stifled a cough/laugh, still not used to the fact that Akaashi was a bit of a sexual deviant. “Thank you for the observation.”

“Kaashiiii-” Bokuto cooed into Akaashi’s thigh as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriends legs. “What did you think of me when you first saw me?”

Akaashi ran his fingers through Bokuto’s hair and smiled down at him. “I thought you looked like you would be good at taking orders in and out of the bedroom.”

Kuroo stifled another cough/laugh as he watched his best-friend submissively press his face into Akaashi’s thigh. Bokuto kissed his skin lightly.

“Bokuto, bedroom. Now.” Akaashi said the words softly but Bokuto was out of the room in seconds.

Kuroo snorted at their daily antics. He never would have guessed Bokuto to be the submissive type, but the way he fawned over Akaashi was unreal. It also made his chest heavy with want (not for the submission, just the relationship).

“I thought you’d want some privacy to do that.” Akaashi explained as he motioned toward the door Bokuto had just exited.

Kuroo nodded gratefully and looked back down at the profile he had opened. “Daichi- cute name. He’s my age. You were right about him being rugged, he is  _ jacked. _ ” Kuroo held his phone toward Akaashi to show him the shirtless photo he had come across. 

Akaashi’s eyebrows shot up slowly as he scrolled through the photos. “He looks like- boyfriend material. Husband material. But he also looks like the kind of guy who had unrequited feelings for his best friend all throughout high school and moved on about a month ago.”

Kuroo eyes widened slightly. “That’s oddly specific.”

Akaashi shrugged. “Swipe right.”

So Kuroo swiped right.

An hour and a lukewarm cup of coffee later, Kuroo’s eyes were starting to hurt as he stared at the screen. Akaashi and Bokuto collapsed against the couch next to him, already having been tired out from the rigorous sex session they ditched his date seraching for. He was eternally grateful that the walls were so thick.

“Find anybody else?” Bokuto’s words were mostly muffled as he spoke against Akaashi’s neck.

“I’m stuck on this one-”

“If you’re stuck then swipe right, Tetsuro.”

Kuroo groaned and tossed them his phone. Akaashi sat up and looked at the profile Kuroo had up. He showed it to Bokuto who raised his eyebrows in interest. “He’s cute. Looks young. He’d fall in love with you in a month and probably love you until you die. I don’t know if you’d reciprocate as hard as he would like, but I can see it lasting.”

“Your analysis is scary specific.”

“I went through a lot of profiles before I found the only one that meant anything to me.” Akaashi responded simply.

How he could go from letting a blindfolded Bokuto pound him into oblivion to saying things like  _ that _ forever escaped Kuroo. How Bokuto didn’t absolutely die when Akaashi said things like that was also beyond his understanding of their relationship. Again, his chest tightened.

So Kuroo swiped right.

He swiped right through breakfast as well as after his shower. He finally decided to take a break and stopped at one last profile. It had one photo and a dismal amount of personal information. He scoffed at the lack of effort until he opened the profile. It was different from the others. “What about this guy?” He turned the phone to Akaashi who was now straddling Bokuto on the couch.

“What interests you about this one?” Akaashi asked with narrowed eyes.

Bokuto tilted the phone his way. “Uh-”

“The...simplicity?”

“Is that a question?” Bokuto implored with a quiet laugh.

“Uh, no…?” Akaashi snorted, ugly and quiet, and Bokuto shuddered at the comforting sound. Kuroo narrowed his eyes at both of them. “You two are disgusting.”

Bokuto laughed gleefully and handed the phone back to Kuroo. “There’s barely any info and he only has one photo, it’s the side of his head.”

“He’s cute though.” Kuroo responded quietly as he held the phone closer to his face.

“He wouldn’t treat you right. You’d probably love him and he wouldn’t love you back, not right away at least, maybe eventually after a lot of drama and pining on your part.”

“Why do you-”

“I’m an editor, Kuroo. I’ve read every trope imaginable at this point.” Akaashi almost sounded sullen at his realization. 

Bokuto wrapped his arms tight around Akaashi’s waist and pulled him close. “Even the met on a dating app and accidentally sent me a nude which led to sex in the car on the way  _ to _ the date?”

Akaashi smiled fondly at the memory. He winked at Bokuto and kissed the tip of his nose. “Who said it was accidental?”

Bokuto blushed and started sputtering as Akaashi lifted off of him and went into the kitchen. 

“Disgusting.” Kuroo repeated. He let out an audible whine as he stared at the almost faceless photo. He could see about half of his face, framed by dyed blonde hair that seemed to have darker roots. His profile said he likes video games and cats. That was it, that appeared to be the extent of his interests. He looked up at Bokuto and then towards Akaashi as he disappeared into the kitchen. They were the ones who said he should  _ try _ so why not give each of them a shot?

So Kuroo swiped right.

He tossed his phone onto the coffee table and went about his day.

By the next day, he had 3 matches. He frowned at them slightly as he realized he didn’t match with the fourth guy. The lack of interest made him more interested and that was when Kuroo admitted that he must be a masochist.

_ Lev: You have amazing hair. _

Kuroo snorted at the first incoming message. He pulled up Lev’s profile again and swiped through the pictures of the tall silver-haired beauty. He was definitely loaded, there was no doubt about it. Kuroo was about to do a reverse image search and realized Lev looked familiar because he was a model, he was the face of designer clothes, designer colognes and he was pretty sure he was his face on a billboard earlier that day. The only thing he wasn’t sure of was whether or not it was really Lev. Some of the pictures seemed a bit too personal to have simply stolen from a fans collection of them, but Kuroo still wasn’t sure.

_ Kuroo: thank you?  _

_ Lev: You’re most welcome :) Can I take you out? _

_ Kuroo: Straight to the point, huh? _

_ Lev: Yeah, I figured why waste time, ya know? You’re cute, I’m cute, let’s make it happen. _

Kuroo stared at the messages coming through his phone. Fuck it.

_ Kuroo: Let’s do it. When and where? _

_ Lev: How about today? How about now? _

I was 5pm but he supposed he could go for an early dinner. 

_ Kuroo: Where should I meet you? _

_ Lev: No, no, I’ll pick you up. Let me? _

_ Kuroo: sure, I’ll be ready in a half hour. _

_ Lev: Make it an hour and I’ll be there. _

Everything Akaashi said was right. Lev showed up in the backseat of a blacked out Lincoln Continental that had a ridiculous vanity plate. 

The driver jumped out before Kuroo had a chance to reach for the door. Kuroo slid in ready to greet Lev, but the backseat had someone else entirely. The driver pushed the door shut before Kuroo had a chance to react. He stiffened in his seat as he prepared to be murdered in the backseat of a stranger’s car right outside of his apartment. 

“Oh, hi! You must be Kuroo. I’m Yaku Morisuke. I’m Lev’s agent.” The shorter man greeted him with a forced smile that didn’t seem friendly in the slightest.

“Why?”

Yaku’s smile faded as the car pulled away from the curb. “Why what?”

Kuroo cleared his throat. “Why are you here?”

Yaku glared. “No need to be so rude-”

“Ah, this is a catfish right? I’m sorry man, but I’m not-”

“Oh shut up,” Yaku replied with a hard roll of his eyes. “We are meeting him at the restaurant.”

“Why?”

“Why are you still asking stupid questions?”

“ _ Excuse me _ ?” 

Yaku snorted out a laugh. “He really does pick dumb ones.” Kuroo’s face flushed in anger and Yaku held his hands up. “I’m joking, I’m joking. I just wanted to scope you out before you met him.”

Kuroo squinted in confusion at his explanation. “Wait- who was messaging me?”

“I was.”

“This- this is a  _ blind date _ ?” 

Yaku nodded casually, sitting further back in his seat as they reached the restaurant. “He will already be inside. The reservation is under Morisuke. Have fun, Tetsuro Kuroo!”

Kuroo stepped out of the car, still in a decent amount of shock, and straightened his jacket out. He had zero interest in going on a blind date, he barely wanted to go on any kind of date. 

A hostess led him to a secluded corner of the restaurant a few minutes later. A good amount of his worries dissipated when he saw the blindingly white smile directed at him. 

Lev stood and held his hand out. His smile seemed shy. “You must be Kuroo?”

“Tetsuro is fine.” Kuroo sat across from Lev, sinking into the overly comfortable chair.

Lev gave a waiter a short wave and their glasses were filled with a red wine a few minutes later.

“So, did you know you were being set up?”

Lev chuckled softly and shook his head, some of his ashen hair falling in his face. “No, no. I didn’t. I’ve been being pressured to get out more so this was a bit of a trick. My agent, Yaku, told me this was a business meeting but he also showed me your picture, so I knew it wasn’t a business meeting pretty quickly.” 

Kuroo had to admit, Lev was beyond gorgeous. Half of his hair was slicked back, the other half seemed to have started to fall toward his face as if the weight of the day was bearing down on his follicles. He was soft spoken but Kuroo couldn’t help but notice the gift bag at his feet. “What have you got down there?”

Lev smiled softly and reached for the small bag. He pushed it toward Kuroo. “For you.”

“You didn’t have to-”

“I know, I wanted to.” Lev clarified with a short wave.

Sure enough, Akaashi was somehow right in every single thing he always said. Kuroo looked down at a small gold container of Russian Amber that he knew cost at least a couple of hundred dollars. He couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped his mouth. “This is- this is too much-”

“Not at all. It was the smallest gift I could find. There’s something else in there-”

Kuroo inhaled sharply as he noticed the signature orange box in the bottom of the bag, settled into the tissue paper like it was a ten-thousand dollar baby bird. “No-”

“It’s just a gift.”

“We  _ just _ met, Lev. This isn’t something I’d even accept from my mother.”

Lev’s smile faltered slightly as his gaze fell to the wine glass in his hand. He ran his fingertips around the rim. “I apologize-”

“If you don’t mind me asking, how old are you, Lev?”

“I’m 21.”

Kuroo nodded, smiling. “I figured as much. You probably started modeling not long after high school?” Lev nodded as well, still circling his wine glass, motioning for him to continue. “You’re still young, the first guy that you go on a blind date with doesn’t have to be your forever.”

Lev frowned a little more but remained pleasant. “I do know that you’re right. I also know I’m hopelessly in love with my agent.” Lev sighed with all the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Kuroo snorted, leaning forward slightly. “The shrimp with the nasty attitude?”

Lev laughed loudly, his eyes bright and focused. “Yes, yes, that one. The shrimp with the nasty attitude. Oh, he would hate that.”

Kuroo rested his chin on his hand and reached for a piece of bread. “Why hopelessly?”

Lev looked up as if he didn’t understand the question, tilting his head slightly. He pondered the question for a moment and took a drink from his wine glass. He reached for a piece of bread as well. “It’s complicated- he doesn’t see me that way. Never has.”

“How long has he been around?” Kuroo could tell by the way Lev talked about him that he was in love with Yaku. His eyes brightened at the mention of his name a few minutes before. The corners of his lips were permanently turned up as they discussed him. 

“Since high school, we’ve been friends since then. I was a freshman and he was a senior. We stayed in contact after he graduated. He ended up working at an agency I was interested in and we’ve been working together since.”

“I hate to ask so bluntly, but is he gay?”

Lev scoffed, no actual bite behind it. “I couldn’t tell you. I’d like to think so but that’s probably my bias being forced on him. He’s never had a girlfriend that I’m aware of but I don’t think he’s had a boyfriend either.”

Kuroo smirked at the taller man. “So since the two of you have been friends, he’s always been single?”

“As far as I’m aware and we spend most minutes of the day together. We even live together.”

“You live  _ together _ ?”

“Sure, Yaku thought it would be more convenient than when we were living down the hall from each other.”

Kuroo couldn’t help but cackle. He had to wipe tears by the end of his laughing fit. “You’re telling - you’re telling me that you don’t think the feelings are mutual?” Lev stared at him strangely, not at all understanding what Kuroo was getting at. “Do you think he’s still here?”

“Probably-”

“Give me your phone.”

A raunchy text message and 4 minutes letter, Yaku was storming to their table with a face redder than anybody’s ever should be, his phone clutched between his white-knuckled fingers. “LEV HAIBA!” Yaku’s screaming got the attention of more people than they would have liked. A waiter closed the curtain between their secluded table and the other people.

“Yaku!” Kuroo watched Lev’s eyes light up wickedly.

Kuroo snorted as he watched the angry little man seethe in front of Lev. Lev still hadn’t seen the text that Kuroo sent and Kuroo was desperately trying to hold in laughter as he watched Lev get glared at within an inch of his life.

“What’s wrong, Yaku?”

Yaku shoved the phone in Lev’s face. “Do you mean this?”

Lev’s eyes widened as he read the message that said something along the lines of Lev between Yaku’s legs the entire ride back to their apartment. Lev was too terrified to speak so he simply nodded.

Yaku grabbed Lev’s wrist and yanked him up. “This-” He pointed between the still scared Lev and a still chortling Kuroo, “-is done. Let’s go.”

Lev fumbled to his feet and to speak. “Don’t worry- the bill- get whatever you want- Thank you!”

Kuroo had another bottle of wine, two entrees, an incredibly large slice of chocolate covered chocolate cake. He stumbled to a cab then stumbled into his room. 

By himself.

  
  


He woke up to a message from match #2: Daichi Sawamura. All that ran through Kuroo’s mind while he scrolled through Daichi’s pictures was  _ hot, hot, hot, hot _ . He was unbearably hot. Kuroo was sure he was a nice easy-going guy as well, but it was his decision to put those drool inducing shirtless photos on there. He was half hard when Daichi’s message popped up.

_ Daichi: Hey chicken strip. _

Kuroo raised an eyebrow at the greeting.

_ Kuroo: Hi buffalo wing _

_ Daichi: How’s your day going, pepperoni pizza _

Kuroo snorted. 

_ Kuroo: so far so good, peanut butter cup, how’s yours _

_ Daichi: this conversation is making me hungry. How about lunch :) _

Kuroo spent the next 5 minutes laughing until he could barely breathe. 

_ Daichi: I didn’t think it was that bad. I have some more I’d be willing to try on you. _

_ Kuroo: no, it was kind of great actually. _

_ Daichi: are your allergies acting up? Do you need some vitamin me ;) _

Kuroo hollered with laughter again, loud enough that Bokuto barged into his room.

_ Daichi: as a registered nurse, I suggest either vitamin me or vitamin D  _

“Why the fuck are you in here howling at 8am?” Bokuto landed on Kuroo’s bed with a thump.

Kuroo wiped tears away and turned his phone to Bokuto. Bokuto’s face went red as he tried to hold in his laughter long enough to finish reading the ridiculous flurry of dad jokes. “BRO!”

“Bro, I know!” Kuroo took his phone back and immediately set up a date with Daichi. Bokuto left to tell Akaashi some new pick-up lines.

_ Daichi: I’ll be honest, I thought this app was more tinder and less match.com _

_ Kuroo: ah so no daylight then? _

_ Daichi: oh come on, kuroo. I’d at least take you out to dinner first. Thennnn no sunlight _

Kuroo was into the forwardness Daichi was presenting. A one-night stand couldn’t hurt, if it was good: maybe a two night stand? 

_ Kuroo: your place or mine? _

_ Daichi: mine works. If you’re free tonight, I can make dinner. _

_ Kuroo: i am officially free tonight. _

Kuroo went to Daichi’s apartment, showing up without hesitation even if it might be the second time that week that he could possibly be murdered. If he was going to die, he was going to die looking at a guy that looked like Daichi.

Daichi greeted Kuroo with a small smile, wearing a plain white t-shirt and black joggers, making his tanned skin stand out. The shirt was tight enough that Kuroo felt the need to wipe his chin after seeing how the cotton hugged his biceps. He had no idea how he was going to last through dinner when all he wanted to do was bend Daichi over his own couch. Or Daichi could bend him over the couch, he really wasn’t picky.

Dinner was incredible, further cementing the good boyfriend title that Daichi probably owned to a T. 

“I have to ask… did you just get out of a relationship or something?”

Daichi smiles around the neck of his beer. “Nah. Not exactly.”

Kuroo narrowed his eyes slightly and simply assumed that Akaashi was right yet again. Oh well, at least he was about to get a good night out of it. They shared dessert and a few more beers before they were sitting suspiciously close on the couch. Daichi leaned his head back, exposing the tanned vein ridden skin of his neck. 

Kuroo went for it.

He pressed his lips against Daichi’s neck, peppering open-mouthed kisses toward his collarbone.

“Fuck- finally-” Daichi breathed, eliciting a quiet chuckle from each of them.

Kuroo slipped his hand under Daichi’s shirt and had to bite back a groan at the feel of the hard muscle. Daichi didn’t hold back at all, moaning quietly as Kuroo brushed his fingers over Daichi’s nipple. Kuroo smirked as he moved to straddle him.

“So what’s your story?”

Daichi coughed in response. He lifted his arms as Kuroo pulled his shirt off, tugging on Kuroo’s until he did the same. “I don’t know- I didn’t just get out of a relationship, I haven’t been in one for a while. I’ve been waiting for someone, I guess. Ow- fuck-” Daichi cursed as Kuroo bit into his shoulder. He didn’t move at all though, an unspoken invitation for Kuroo to continue. “I was waiting but I got tired of it.”

“Hmm.” Kuroo hummed in response, grinding his hips against Daich’s hardness. “You don’t seem like you’d have a hard time getting a date.”

Daichi groaned and reached to unbutton Kuroo’s jeans. “I wasn’t looking for a date.”

“You must be in love.” Kuroo’s comment was accompanied by a nervous laugh, but judging by the way Daichi tugged his fly open, Kuroo was right. 

“Must be.” Daichi rubbed Kuroo over his boxers, the angle awkward but somehow satisfying.

“You can go back to being in love tomorrow after this stellar blow job I’m about to give you.” Kuroo announced as he moved to the floor between Daichi’s legs.

Daichi snorted as he watched Kuroo make himself comfortable, the tent in his pants hard to ignore. 

Daichi groaned Kuroo’s name one last time, a stuttered “T-tets-tetsu-” breaking from his mouth. Kuroo was not lying, it was most definitely a stellar blow job. Daichi had half a mind to pass out immediately after if he didn’t have an overwhelming sense of wanting to reciprocate the affections. He lazily pointed at a bag on his coffee table. “Condoms.”

“Lube?” Kuroo questioned as he reached into the bag. 

“Side pocket.” 

“Do you prefer-”

“I’m fine with either.” Daichi responded as his eyes became lidded. 

Another point for Akaashi, Daichi was indeed a switch. 

Kuroo was bottoming out inside of Daichi minutes later with the latter bent beautifully over his own couch. They had both sloppily shed all of their clothes, Kuroo kicking his boxers somewhere across the wood floor. Daichi arched his back and moaned so lewdly, Kuroo wanted to come right then and there. He was  _ not _ going to last long. He gripped Daichi’s shoulders as he thrust into him, each snap of his hips earning him another groan from the man below him. 

They were both spent and wobbly in the knees less than 10 minutes later. Kuroo collapsed against Daichi and even though the sex was good, it really was good, it was just that...good. Only good. He didn’t feel a spark, he didn’t feel any kind of connection. Daichi would make a great friend with benefits, but their relationship would never go further than that. It seemed that Daichi thought the same. Daichi cleaned the both of them off with a damp towel and sunk back into his couch. He ran a hand over his face and sighed softly.

“Don’t worry about it, Dai. I seem to be phenomenal at attracting people who are just about to get with their soulmate. I think there’s a movie about that out there.” Kuroo said with a laugh as he pulled his boxers and jeans back on. 

Daichi tossed him his shirt and pulled his own boxers on. He stood in front of Kuroo and they kissed one last time. Still nothing. They both pulled away with a laugh.

“Friends?” Kuroo asked, savoring Daichi’s mouth for a moment.

Daichi kissed him one more time. “Friends.”

Kuroo matched with the third guy a week later. He decided to message that guy first.

_ Kuroo: hi, it’s nice to match with you. I’m tetsuro. _

_ Tsukishima: I got that from ur profile. I’m Tsukishima _

_ Kuroo: ohhh, Tsukki! Nice to meet you _

_ Tsukishima: no, it’s Tsukishima.  _

_ Kuroo: how about lunch tsukki? _

_ Tsukishima: ok. But it’s Tsukishima  _

_ Kuroo: are you free today? _

_ Tsukishima: no _

_ Kuroo: tomorrow? _

_ Tsukishima: no _

Kuroo sighed and tapped his thumb against his phone.

_ Tsukishima: i’m free tuesday. I work at the museum, there’s a nice restaurant here we can go to _

_ Kuroo: sure thing, tsukki. See you tuesday at noon _

_ Tsukishima: it’s tsukishima _

Kuroo ended up hanging out with Daichi pretty often. He invited him over for pizza and video games with Bokuto on Sunday night. Daichi ended up bringing a guest.

Kuroo opened the door and eyed the silver-haired beauty with a bright smile on his face. His hand was tightly laced with Daich’s and he was nuzzled against his side. It was adorable and disgusting. “Oya, what’s this?”

Bokuto popped up behind him, eyebrows raised in interest. “Oya? Dadchi brought a date?”

Daichi’s boyfriend(?) laughed out loud. “Dadchi?”

Daichi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, a motion he had become used to since he started hanging out with the Terrible Two. “Kuroo, Bokuto, this is Suga.”

Suga held his hand out. “The love of his past, present, and future that he was too stupid to confess to. Nice to meet you.”

Bokuto hooted out a laugh and Kuroo chortled. Daichi sighed again and started regretting bringing Suga to meet the two of them. Kuroo swung an arm around Suga and led him inside, giving him a short tour of the apartment. 

Daichi sat on the couch with his arms crossed after accepting a beer from Bokuto. “I never got a tour,” He said dejectedly.

“And this...dundunduuuun, is my bedroom!”

Daichi sighed for the third time in 5 minutes.

Akaashi came home from work sometime between a 9th round of Mario Kart and examined the pile of idiots who were simultaneously trying to play video games as well as a round of what looked like drunk Twister. He tilted his head as Bokuto tried to put his right hand on the red circle while maneuvering over Suga’s left foot on the blue circle. One wrong move and they were all going to fall.

“Akaaaashiii!” Bokuto’s head shot up to grin at his boyfriend. He whimpered immediately after seeing the look on Akaashi’s face.

Akaashi was studying his lover and wondering how he managed to twist himself into that position all while balancing on one leg with the other resting on his knee. “I didn’t know you were so flexible.”

Kuroo groaned. “Not already, guys, have some self-control.”

Daichi spun the dial. “Kuroo- right hand on yellow.”

Kuroo looked around for the yellow dot and realized it was directly next to Suga. He smirked at the beautiful man and ended up pressed against his side. 

“Oh, hi!” Suga greeted him with glee. 

Daichi didn’t sigh, he didn’t need to. It was implied. “Suga- ah fucking hell, right foot on red.”

The closest red circle was under Bokuto. Suga glanced at Akaashi who was now kneeled next to them watching in interest. Suga stretched his leg out until it slid under Bokuto who yelped at the touch. Suga’s foot delicately glided into a resting position and now Bokuto was one move was laying in his lap.

“I want to join. Give me two to start.” Akaashi studied the mat, seemingly having decided where he was going to land. 

Daichi spun. “Right foot green, left foot-” Daichi glanced up at the Twister mat and cleared his throat before speaking. “...blue…”

Kuroo glanced at the dots and groaned again.

Akaashi was now straddling Suga who was way too excited about it.

“Alright, I’m done!” Kuroo let himself fall to the floor. 

Bokuto was silent, watching Akaashi with wide eyes. “Kaashi-”

“Would you two be up for a foursome?”

Kuroo expected the other couple to be taken aback, at least for a second. He expected hesitation from Daichi but he definitely didn’t suspect the overly enthusiastic yes from Suga. 

“Yup, and that’s my cue to leave.” Kuroo immediately stood, grabbed a pizza box, and retreated to his room.

“I didn’t mean today! Some other time.” Akaashi defended (from Suga’s lap).

“How about it, Daichi? I’m down!” Suga turned to his boyfriend who was still staring in awe.

“Uh- okay. I mean, sure. Yeah. That’s fine.” Bokuto was yipping and Daichi was blushing.

As Kuroo leaned into the hall to close his door, he spotted Akaashi and Suga already making out. He loved his roommates, absolutely loved them, but he also hated them.

Kuroo flopped onto his bed and was once again thankful at how thick the walls were. He was a lucky man. He flipped on his TV for extra background noise and scrolled through his phone. The date with Tsukki was in a couple of days and he wasn’t feeling super confident about it. Akaashi had been right so far and the last thing he wanted was to lead someone on and have them “love him more than he will ever love them”. That sounded like another bad movie he didn’t want to be a part of.

He searched through his matches and frowned when he realized he still didn’t match with the blonde. He wasn’t giving up hope, not yet anyway.

Tuesday approached and Kuroo found himself tapping his fingers against a white tablecloth as he waited for Tsukki. He glanced at his phone: 12:16. He didn’t expect to be stood up, he hadn’t taken that particular result into consideration. The waiter stopped at his table again to see if he wanted to order. He apologized and declined, leaving a tip for the water he ordered and her patience. 

He pulled his jacket back on when he got outside, frowning at the entire situation. He’d never been stood up before, but he also hadn’t gone on that many dates before. It was a bit of a kick to his confidence. He turned toward the parking lot and started walking. 

A flurry of footsteps behind him made him turn around to see Tsukishima bounding toward him, arms waiting wildly. Kuroo stopped and stared at the younger guy as he took a breath in front of him. 

“I’m so sorry, I got held up at the museum with some paperwork. I didn’t realize my phone had died because I worked all night and I forgot to charge it. I-I didn’t plan to stand you up.” 

Kuroo tilted his head slightly and gave a small smile. “It’s alright.”

Tsukishima shook his head vigorously. “It’s really not, it’s not. Let me make it up to you.”

Kuroo studied the blonde breathing heavily in front of him. The museum was a bit of a walk so he must have ran there. He was disheveled and out of breath, there were coffee stains on his gray sweater, probably from the overnight he had just worked. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days. Kuroo shook his head and felt guilty as he watched Tsukishima’s face fall. “You look exhausted.”

Tsukishima rubbed the back of his neck and frowned. “I am, but I can-”

Kuroo held a hand up, effectively stopping the conversation. “No, hey, it’s fine. Let’s go somewhere else. I know a quieter place.”

Tsukishima’s smile started to spread back across his face. 

Kuroo took him to his favorite bookstore that had sectioned off areas. It connected to a small cafe that he had always wanted to take a date to. An hour into their light conversation, coffee, and pastries Kuroo decided Tsukki was the best one so far. He was charming albeit a bit shy, he was nice though he was a bit snarky. Kuroo found himself enthralled with the conversation.

He bit into a second piece of cake and chewed on it thoughtfully. “So any abnormally close best friends or ex boyfriends that I need to know about?”

Tsukishima raised his eyebrows, blinking rapidly behind his glasses, so as to keep himself awake. “Not that I'm aware of.”

“When was your last relationship, Tsukki?”

“Tsukishima. It was, I don’t know- a couple of years ago probably. We don’t speak anymore.”

“Amicable breakup?”

“He cheated.”

Kuroo winced. “Ah, sorry to hear that.”

“What about you?”

“It’s been a while- I dated the same guy all through high school but we broke up the day of graduation.” He laughed humorlessly at the memory. Nothing like being dumped by your boyfriend and best friend because  _ you would hold him back _ . He shook his head to rid himself of something he had long since gotten over, for the sake of his own mental health. “I just never had much interest in retaining a relationship after.”

“But you do now?” Tsukki asked with interest. He was leaning forward slightly and everything Akaashi said flew right out of Kuroo’s mind because wouldn’t it be so nice to have somebody love you as hard as they possibly could?

Kuroo nodded, leaning forward slightly as well. “I do now. I think...I’m lonely.”

“Me too.”

Kuroo and Tsukki shared a smile and the rest of Kuroo’s cake. Kuroo drove Tsukki back to the museum and they set a second date.

  
  


They saw each other twice a week for a few months before Kuroo insisted on declaring it official. He bought Tsukki a strawberry shortcake in the shape of a dinosaur. Tsukki sighed dramatically but had the biggest smile on his face as he ate it. Kuroo has quickly learned Tsukki wasn’t great at communicating and sharing his emotions, but when it was just the two of them: things were great. The conversation was always lacking something, but the sex and comfort made up for it. 

A triple date ended up being on the books around their 6 month mark. Kuroo and Tsukki met up with Bokuto and Akaashi who had already gathered Daichi and Suga. Tsukki didn’t completely fit in with the group as he was the youngest, he could also be a bit standoffish but they made it work. Kuroo made sure to never leave him alone in the group so he didn’t get too uncomfortable and Tsukki always at least attempted to make an effort. 

Bokuto on the other hand, not so much. There was just something about Tsukki that Bokuto didn’t seem to like. Mostly, it was that he didn’t think Tsukki and Kuroo were endgame and he was worried that Tsukki just wasn’t good enough for Kuroo. He didn’t like the way Tsukki didn’t completely fit in with their friend group, he also didn’t like the way Tsukki seemed to be constantly insulting all of them (if one really studied all of Bokuto’s issues with Tsukki it boiled down to Tsukki calling Bokuto a dumbass for pulling a ‘push’ door, the rest is just Bokuto trying to find reasons to dislike him).

Suga and Akaashi insisted they sit in the very back of the theatre which confused Tsukki, who wasn’t yet used to their sexual antics, and he wanted to sit in the middle of the theatre. Kuroo compromised by sitting on a far side of the theatre where nobody else was sitting so Suga and Akaashi could feel up their boyfriends in private.

Tsukki made the mistake of his life when he looked back and saw Akaashi groping Bokuto over his jeans as well as Suga’s teeth attached to Daichi’s neck. He turned back toward the screen, red-faced, and sunk down into his seat.

“Don’t mind them.” Kuroo said with a short laugh. He pushed his box of candy toward the blonde.

Tsukki shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t know how they can- just be like that. In  _ public _ !”

Kuroo shrugged. “You get used to it.”

“I can’t imagine ever doing that.”

Kuroo glanced sideways at Tsukki and saw how uncomfortable he was which in turn made him more uncomfortable because Tsukki seemed to not like his best friends. Granted, they could be a lot to get used to (especially when it came to the obvious lack of shame) but they were great people. He reached for Tsukki’s stiff hand and laced their fingers together. Tsukki relaxed exponentially. Kuroo leaned over to whisper in his ear, “Don’t worry, I enjoy hand holding as much as they enjoy making out.” It wasn’t the truth, but it seemed to be what Tsukki needed to hear.

The action movie Bokuto chose (and neglected to watch) drowned out the porno going on behind them. When the lights came on to signal the end of the movie, Akaashi was straightening his shirt and Daichi was zipping his sweater up to his chin.

“You’re all  _ shameless _ .”

“You can join next time, Tetsu.” Suga offered with a sly smile.

“Who goes to the movies to watch a movie?” Akaashi asked with a bored expression.

“Literally...everyone.” Tsukki muttered as he trailed behind the group.

Bokuto glared at Tsukki and did not go out of his way to hold the door open for him. Bokuto could be a teddy bear, or he could be a petty bear. There wasn’t always an in between.

Four of them headed to dinner after (minus Daichi and Suga as Daichi was too embarrassed to walk around with a boner any longer). They went to Kuroo’s favorite pho spot and made themselves comfortable in a booth.

“So, Tsukkidude, what are your-”

“Tsukishima.”

“What?”

“It’s Tsukishima.”

Bokuto cleared his throat loudly. “ _ Tsukishimmya- _ what are your intentions with Kuroo? Do you plan to marry him eventually?”

Kuroo choked on his fried dumpling. “ _ What _ ? Bo, what?”

Tsukki rolled his eyes. “Probably one day.”

Kuroo then choked on his water that he was drinking to save himself from choking on his dumpling. He stared at Tsukki who seemed unaffected by both Bokuto’s question as well as his own reaction. “You want to marry me?”

Tsukki shrugged. “Yeah. One day. Isn’t that what people who are in love do?”

Kuroo pushed his eyebrows together as he blinked at Tsukki. “What?”

Tsukki, again, was unaffected. “What’s wrong?”

“You- you love me? You’re in love with me?”

Tsukki frowned. “Yes.” He laughed shortly. “Are you not?” His laugh faded as Kuroo continued staring at him. “Oh.”

“Can we- can we talk outside?” Kuroo said abruptly.

“Why? You can crush my hopes and dreams right here, Tetsuro.” Tsukki responded bluntly. He was trying to make it seem sarcastic but Kuroo could tell his feelings were beyond hurt by the look in his eyes and the way he was tapping his foot.

“Kei- not here. This is a conversation we should have in private. Can we go outside?”

“I’d rather not.”

“Kei!” Kuroo started to get impatient at that point. Tsukki had not once told him that he loved him, he hadn’t even hinted at the words. He barely told Kuroo that he  _ liked _ him. They never discussed the status of their relationship, they just let the days pass. It was easy. At least Kuroo thought it was.

“You don’t love me?” Tsukki asked quietly as he stared at the bubbles in his soda.

“I mean- I just- I don’t know, Kei. I haven’t- I’m just…” Kuroo took a deep breath. “I’m not there yet.”

“But you will be, right?”

Kuroo pushed his hands through his hair and Tsukki’s frown reappeared. “I’d like to say yes.”

“Don’t say yes just to appease me.”

Kuroo reached for Tsukki’s hand under the table but stopped when Tsukki moved it away. 

Akaashi tugged on Bokuto’s hand and pulled him out of the booth. “We are going to go. I apologize.” Akaashi pulled Bokuto out of the restaurant before the latter could say anything else.

Kuroo stared at the table in defeat. He didn’t want the relationship to end, it was so early.

“So…” Tsukki stabbed the dumpling with his chopsticks. “Are we done?”

“Do you want to be?” Kuroo hated the way his voice cracked. Maybe he wasn’t there yet, maybe he didn’t love Tsukki back, but maybe he could. Only time would tell, right?

“No.”

“Then no, Kei. We are not done.”

They tried to survive that revelation but they didn’t. Things went on quite awkwardly for another half a year. They broke up amicably on their 1 year anniversary after a disastrous attempt at dinner. Kuroo was relieved that they didn’t move in together like they had planned. Tsukishima met someone 3 days later and immediately started dating. Kuroo was fine with that, it was his curse.

  
  


Kuroo was invited to a tech conference that he had a small amount of interest in attending but Bokuto and Akaashi insisted he needed to get out of the house after spending a solid 3 weeks inside binge watching different TV shows on Netflix after Tsukki dumped him (Tsukki  _ didn’t _ dump him, but saying that was making Kuroo feel better).

He checked into his hotel room and found himself in the bar around 8:30 that night ordering a glass of whiskey that was way too strong. He flirted lightly with the hot bartender that had an eyebrow piercing but eventually went back to his room. Alone.

He stepped into the elevator and kept his eyes trained on the numbers, waiting for it to reach 22. Someone else stepped in, glanced at the illuminated button, and bowed their head again. Kuroo rubbed his eyes, checked his phone and considered downloading that  _ stupid _ app again just to get something out of his system. The elevator dinged, signalling his floor’s arrival, and he followed a short head of blonde hair down the hall. Evidently they were staying across from each other.

Kuroo searched his pockets for his keycard as he thought about the only match that didn’t swipe back for him. It was annoying. Kuroo hated the fact that he couldn’t just ask the guy why he didn’t swipe to match with him as well. Kuroo would swipe right on himself. He was a  _ catch _ .

He dropped his keycard three times before finally unlocking his door. He heard a snort behind him and turned to see the short blonde watching him from his doorway as he closed it. They met each other’s eyes for half a second and Kuroo used that moment to glare.

Kuroo sat through talks and seminars after talks and seminars and he shot off angry texts to Bokuto and Akaashi for making him go. He knew all they  _ really _ wanted was the damn house to themselves so they could cross of Akaashi’s bucket list of sexual fantasies they had yet to try because it probably involved their balcony or a kiddie pool filled with jello.

He spent another night in the bar that led to another elevator ride with the blonde that was staying across from him. That time, Kuroo noticed his badge: blondie was with the Bouncing Ball Corporation, a nationally known corporation that came up ( _ bounced _ up?) out of absolutely nowhere with a teenager at the helm of it. The CEO of the company supposedly had several ventures that they were invested in. Kuroo always just wondered how the hell a teenager devoted enough time to do what he did. He invested in it early on, he had bought a few stocks when they were cheap after an app he was using suggested it. They blew up in days. The stocks he purchased as a young adult made him enough money to not have to worry much about work (though he did still work, he enjoyed it). He wasn’t rich by any means but he was comfortable even after sending money home to his family every month.

“You work for Bouncing Ball?” Kuroo asked as the elevator started to approach their floor.

“Yeah.” The blonde’s head was fully concentrated on his phone.

Kuroo waited for him to expand on the conversation but he didn’t hear another word from the blonde until they were closing their doors. A soft “goodnight” hung in the air between them. Kuroo hesitated too long to respond and the blonde smirked and closed his door. Kuroo glared at the now shut door, no bite behind him, mostly confusion. Why did that guy look so damn familiar?

Kuroo didn’t realize until the last trek to his room. He took it by himself that time and he found himself being a bit disappointed about that. He was staring down at his keycard and thinking about what time he was going to leave in the morning. The elevator doors squeaked up a floor before him and the man that had been plaguing him entered without a word, his phone inches from his eyes, his neck bent, and his hair hanging in his face.

Kuroo didn’t say anything.

He finally glanced at blondie again and it hit him.

“You-!” He said much too loudly, pointing his finger at the man that jumped slightly at the loud voice. “It’s you- you- you-” Kuroo dropped his phone as he tried to dig it out of his pocket. He stepped out of the elevator and the blonde reluctantly followed him. Kuroo downloaded that stupid app again and immediately started getting notifications asking why he hadn’t logged in. His phone started pinging incessantly. 

“Is that BB?”

Kuroo looked up from his phone only semi-aware that the ping notification sound was unique to that app. “Yes.”

Blonde guy nodded and stared at Kuroo. “Why did you-”

“Where  _ are _ you?” Kuroo started muttering as he scrolled through people he had matched with previously that he was waiting for a response from (he only had this option as a paying member of the damn app). The blonde that he had swiped right on almost a year ago wasn’t there any more. He groaned. He looked up again, it  _ had  _ to be him. His phone pinged again as the last notification popped up on his screen. “ _ You’ve got a match! _ ” Kuroo clicked on it and there he was. Kuroo held his phone out. “Maken! Your name is Maken.”

Kenma snorted at the screen and looked down at his phone. “My name is Kenma.”

“No, it’s-” Kuroo’s sentence slowly faded as he realized the very blatant anagram that ‘Maken’ was for ‘Kenma’. 

“Do you enjoy that app?”

Kuroo blinked in response. “I mean, sure, I guess.”

Kenma tilted his head slightly, his hair falling away to reveal soft cat-like brown eyes. “You guess? What’s wrong with it?”

Kuroo furrowed his eyebrows together. He glanced down at the app that he hadn’t really given much thought to other than when he met up with Lev, Daichi, and Tsukishima. “Nothing’s wrong with it. I don’t think you should be able to see the people you wanted to match with but haven’t or won’t match with you- that’s a bit of a self-esteem killer.”

“Yeah. I didn’t like that update.”

“How long have you been using it?”

Kenma shrugged. “I created it.”

Kuroo blinked in response again, losing all sense of eloquence in front of a man almost literally half his size. “You- what?”

“I created it. The app.”

Kuroo started remembering why he was at the conference in the first place. He stepped back self-consciously. “You’re- fuck, man. You’re  _ Kenma _ .”

“Yes, that’s what I said.”

“No- no, no, no. You’re Kenma Kozume- you’re Kodzuen.”

Kenma nodded. “Yeah.”

“How are you so nonchalant about it? You’re like- a millionaire?” Kenma bristled slightly, just enough for Kuroo to notice. “Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean it like that, nothing bad.” Kuroo rubbed his neck self-consciously. 

Kenma’s face turned passive again. He shrugged. “S’okay.”

“Wait, you swiped right on  _ me _ ?” Kuroo smirked at the light blush that dusted Kenma’s cheeks. “Why are you on your own app?”

“I’m lonely.” 

Kenma’s honesty threw Kuroo through a loop. “Same. You live in the area?”

“Yeah, I just like the pillows that this hotel has. And the way that the AC smells-”

“And the sheets, these are some  _ nice _ sheets.” Kuroo agreed. “I live in the area too. My company put me up for the conference. Honestly, it’s really the only reason I came to the conference.”

“You weren’t interested in it?”

“Not really.” Kuroo realized his lack of respect seconds after the words left his mouth. He immediately tried to backtrack. “Oh, I mean- I just mean, I didn’t mean it like  _ that _ . I had  _ some  _ interest because I invested in Bouncing Ball years ago, like back at the beginning and it made me a lot of money.”

“That’s good.” Kenma’s voice was soft, sharp, and quiet. The conversation had a lull in it and Kuroo figured that meant it was over. “I’m leaving tonight and I’ll be back home tomorrow. Do you want to go out?”

“Uh- like on a date?” Kuroo normally had some sense of game, at least of smidge. Kenma stepped back toward his room, keycard in hand. His brows knitted together slightly and Kuroo knew he was definitely asking for a date and probably throwing himself out on a ledge to do it. Kuroo threw his hands up to placate the blonde. “Wait, wait, wait. Yes, yes. I’d love to.”

Kenma nodded and disappeared into his room. Kuroo stood, dumbfounded, in the hallway. He took a step toward Kenma’s door and almost jumped back when it swung open. Kenma held an embossed business card toward him. “I put my number on it.” Kuroo stopped working for a moment so Kenma pushed the card into his hard hesitantly. “Use it or don’t.”

Kuroo waited 3 days before using it. He eventually texted Kenma, taking the lack of conversation as probably not wanting a phone call.

_ Kuroo: Hi, is this Kenma? _

_ Kenma: who else would it be _

_ Kuroo: a stranger that some hot blonde decided to give me the number of instead of his? _

_ Kenma: nice to know you have some sense of conversation  _

Kuroo blushed and cleared his throat as if he was preparing for vocal conversation.

_ Kuroo: i do, sometimes. So when are we going out :) _

_ Kenma: not sure, i’m busy _

Kuroo frowned at the text. 

_ Kuroo: ok, let me know when you’re free. _

Kenma didn’t respond. Kuroo checked his phone throughout the day but decided to give it up when Kenma still hadn’t texted back by that evening. Kenma didn’t text back for another week. Kuroo sat in the living room frowning at the TV, his chin resting on the hell of his palm. He frowned at the stupid rom-com he was watching and almost texted Tsukishima to see if he wanted to hang out. He had to physically stop himself by throwing his phone across the room. Tsukki didn’t need to hear from Kuroo, he didn’t deserve the reminder.

“Hey, hey, hey Kuroo! How are we doing this fine evening?” Bokuto threw himself onto the couch with a wide grin.

Kuroo turned to frown at his best friend. “Great. I am great.”

Bokuto tilted his head slightly. “Are you?”

“I am peachy, Bo. Fuckin’ peachy.” 

Bokuto narrowed his eyes. “I think you’re lying.”

“Oh, ya think? Is that right? Is that something you do often?” Kuroo responded, not taking his eyes off of the TV.

“Hey you don’t need to be a dick-”

“Am I being a dick? I don’t think I am.” 

“What is wrong with you?” Bokuto sat up straight and crossed his arms.

“Nothing is fucking wrong with me!” Kuroo snapped.

“Hey-” Akaashi’s voice carried through the living room. “Don’t talk to him like that. He didn’t do anything to you.”

Kuroo huffed and continued scowling at the TV. 

Bokuto sulked on the opposite end of the couch. He looked over at Akaashi with wide eyes and Akaashi sighed. He stood behind Bokuto and ran his fingers through his hair. “What’s your deal, Tetsuro?”

“Nothing-”

“Stop being an asshole.” 

Kuroo groaned, he really didn’t feel like being on the other side of Akaashi’s wrath that morning. The last time he was he ended up staying in a hotel for 6 nights. “I’m just- I just- I-”

“Kenma still hasn’t texted you?” Akaashi deduced easily from Kuroo’s frustration.

“Noooo-” Kuroo groaned louder.

“Have you texted him?” Kuroo took a moment before admitting that he hadn’t. Akaashi rolled his eyes. “Then text him and stop calling my boyfriend stupid.”

Bokuto focused on Kuroo, clearly waiting for an apology.

“I’m sorry, Bo. I didn’t mean it.”

“Good.” Bokuto leaned into Akaashi’s continued touch. “You’re still a dick.”

Kuroo sighed loudly and got up to grab his phone. It was waiting with a text from Kenma.

_ Kenma: how’s tonight at 9 _

_ Kuroo: 9 for dinner? _

_ Kenma: yes, is that a problem? _

_ Kuroo: it’s a little late, but it’s fine. Where? _

_ Kenma: Ichiban on 9th. _

_ Kuroo: see you there _

Kuro was finally excited. He had been to Ichiban a few times before, it was your basic sushi bar known for its crispy shrimp rolls and store made sake. He pulled on a dark pair of jeans and paired it with a long sleeve white shirt that he rolled up to his elbows. He didn’t bother with his permanent bedhead other than flattening the back of it just slightly. He made it to Ichiban around 8:50 and found a table near the back. 

He got a text at 8:56.

_ Kenma: something came up, sorry. Can’t make it _

Kuroo didn’t really remember anything after that because he became overly familiar with the late night happy hour menu and ended up stumbling home around 2 am.

Light filtering into his room from the smallest crack in his curtains woke him up with a stabbing headache. He rolled over and stretched out against a warm body next to him. A warm body that he had zero recollection of taking home.

Kuroo blinked awake at the same time as the nameless stranger across from him slowly crawled back into existence.

“Ah, fuck-” The stranger groaned.

Kudos to Kuroo because the guy was  _ gorgeous _ . He was lean, a very pretty face, and soft brown hair that was somehow still flower after a night of what Kuroo assumed was rigorous sex.

“I’m going to be honest. I have no idea what your name is.” The stranger admitted as he looked at Kuro with one eye open.

“Tetsuro Kuroo.”

“Really?”

Kuroo snorted, laying back down. “Yeah, I think so.” 

“I think I called you...Teruo?”

“I’m pretty sure I called you Torio. I’m going to assume that is not your name.”

He had a soft laugh, airy and bright. “Tooru. Oikawa.” Oikawa yawned and rolled onto his stomach. He looked back at Kuroo again and winced. “We had sex, right?”

Kuroo looked down at the sheet covering them then the array of clothes strewn about the room. He lifted the sheet. “I’m naked. You’re naked. So yeah, probably.”

Oikawa whined and rubbed his back. “Did I bottom?”

Kuroo didn’t feel the aches and soreness that Oikawa was probably feeling in his back and ass, so he already knew the answer to that question. “I think you did.”

“You must be quite the sweet talker.” Oikawa said into the pillow he was becoming reacquainted with.

Kuroo laughed and scooted toward Oikawa. “I have a very big bathtub and a walk-in shower. I can also cook.” He whispered in Oikawa’s ear.

“All the things I look for in a man.” Oikawa whispered back. He shifted slightly and lifted himself onto his elbows. “Up for another round? One you might even remember?”

“ _ Might _ remember? Oh, those sweet words went straight to my dick.”

They laughed as Oikawa rolled over and pulled Kuroo over him.

Kuroo stumbled into the kitchen for coffee after a quickie and a couple of more hours of sleep. He started a fresh pot of coffee and groaned again as he reached above the fridge for aspirin. He downed three of them and squeezed his eyes shut as the inevitable happened: Bokuto’s booming voice bounced off of the walls.

“Kuroooooo!” Bokuto sang into the kitchen. 

Kuroo pushed his palms into his eyes and wished for a death more swift than his hangover. “Bo, please, it’s too early.”

“It is 11 am and you’re just still drunk.” Bokuto swung an arm over Kuroo’s shoulders. “Have fun last night?”

“We had lots of fun, thank you.” Oikawa padded into the kitchen and took a seat at the counter, laying his head on the cold marble.

Bokuto spun around to interrogate Kuroo’s new flame. “Who are you?”

“Oh I get to introduce myself twice this morning.” Oikawa looked up at the gray-haired man and winked at Kuroo. “Tooru Oikawa, pleasure.”

Akaashi slid in next to Oikawa and leaned closer than necessary. “Akaashi. And that’s Bokuto. You are gorgeous.”

“Look who’s talking.” Oikawa responded easily, his voice deep and husky.

“Can you not hit on every living thing that I bring into this apartment?” Akaashi shot him a dark look and Kuroo groaned, knowing the answer to that question. “I’m moving out.”

Breakfast was an  _ event _ . Bokuto was drooling as he watched Akaashi and Oikawa feed each other. Kuroo started looking at apartment listings in the area as he ignored his surroundings.

“So how’d you two meet? This definitely isn’t who you left the house for.”

“Ah, that makes a lot of sense.” Oikawa said, leaning back in his chair.

“What does?” Kuroo asked over a sip of coffee.

“You were absolutely moping last night. Did you get stood up?” Oikawa frowned as he watched Kuroo. While Oikawa was the one-night stand type when he was bored, Kuroo didn’t seem like it as much as he tried to make it seem like he did.

Akaashi removed his attention from Oikawa and focused on Kuroo. “Kenma stood you up?”

“No.” Kuroo partially lied. He looked up to defend the blonde but Akaashi could always tell when he was lying. “He texted that he couldn’t make it.” Akaashi scoffed. “4 minutes before he was supposed to be there.”

Akaashi scoffed louder. Bokuto frowned at his phone and quickly closed it, his actions were always too obvious. 

“What?” Kuroo asked.

“What what?”

“Bo-”

“What?”

“What did you see?”

“Nothing-”

“Koutarou.” 

Bokuto whined at Akaashi’s use of his first name. He passed his phone to Kuroo, the article he tried desperately to hide on full display. They all leaned over to read the headline:

_ Bouncing Ball’s Biggest Recluse Out On The Town _

The article had pictures of half of Kenma’s face plastered all over it as he ducked into a bar that was  _ across the street _ from Ichiban. Kuroo’s eyes glazed over as he rolled them. “Are you fucking kidding me.” He muttered the words and Akaashi gave him a sympathetic look. As much of a hardass as Akaashi could be with anything other than sex, he did feel bad for Kuroo. He didn’t like seeing one of his best friends in pain. 

“Is that the date?” Oikawa scrolled through the article with his eyebrows arched. “You have interesting taste there, Tetsu. Your date and I are kind of opposites.”

“Well, I can’t say I even looked at your face until this morning.”

Oikawa choked out a laugh. I’d be offended if the feeling wasn’t mutual.”

Kuroo leaned over Oikawa and wrapped his arms around the man. “We are absolutely meant to be.” 

Oikawa giggled and leaned into his touch. He lightly kissed Kuroo’s forearm and looked up at him. “Without a doubt, my future love.”

Oikawa ended up spending the day with the three of them and it almost bothered Kuroo how easily he fit into their little friend group. Daichi and Suga made their way over for pizza and Suga, Akaashi, and Oikawa together were a fucking nightmare together. They were sprawled out on the sofa while Kuroo, Daichi, and Bokuto stared at them. They were a mess of Akaashi’s dark wispy hair, Oikawa’s soft long limbs, and Suga’s beauty marks. They were a  _ sight _ .

“Daichiiii- you’re drooling-” Suga sang the words against Akaashi’s neck.

“Why must everything with you two lead to an orgy?” Kuroo asked with a groan.

“Are we having a orgy?” Oikawa questioned, interest piqued. He thought about it for a moment before wrinkling his nose. “I might just have to watch, Kuroo did a number on my ass last night. I’m having a hard time just sitting on this sofa.”

Kuroo snorted as Daichi choked on his beer and Bokuto whooped.

Akaashi rubbed Oikawa’s cheek. “Next time.”

Oikawa settled between Kuroo’s legs, sitting on a cushion, and leaned back against his chest. He was flipping through movies on Netflix as Kuroo scrolled through his phone. A text popped up on Kuroo’s phone.

_ Kenma: free tonight? _

Kuroo sighed heavily and stared at his phone. 

Oikawa leaned back and hummed. “Is that blondie?”

Kuroo poised his fingers to type back. “Yeah.”

“I’d show up overly fashionably late. If you go, that is.” Oikawa replied with a hair flip.

“Should I- I mean, why would I go?”

“You seem to like the guy. Besides, I’ll make myself available so if you need rescuing I can be there in 4 minutes flat.” 

“You’re not bothered by me going on a date with somebody else?” Kuroo knew the answer but thought it respectful to ask.

Oikawa rolled his head back to stare at Kuroo. “Did you want to date me?”

Kuroo shrugged. “I mean-”

“You can say no, Kuroo. I mean, the sex was great, but I’m really not looking for a relationship. I’d love to be friends with benefits, that would be fun.” 

Kuroo laughed softly and pressed his lips against Oikawa’s hairline. “Sounds good.”

_ Kuroo: are  _ **_you_ ** _ free tonight? _

_ Kenma: why would i ask you if you were free if i wasn’t _

_ Kuroo: you asked me yesterday and you weren’t? _

Kenma’s writing notification started and stopped multiple times over the next 3 minutes. Kuroo bit his lip and started to get frustrated with himself for even liking the damn guy.

_ Kenma: i know a bar that my friend owns. Have you heard of Lips? _

_ Kuroo: the drag bar? _

_ Kenma: yeah, my friend owns it and he has a secret kitchen in the back. _

_ Kuroo: sounds fun. What time? _

_ Kenma: 7? _

_ Kuroo: 7 works _

_ Kenma: i figured, you’re an old man who said 9 was late _

Kuroo snorted and rolled his eyes. 

_ Kuroo: i am not an old man _

_ Kenma: are too _

_ Kuroo: i am not! _

_ Kenma: are too _

Kuroo threw his phone across the room, causing Oikawa to yelp at the sudden movement. 

Akaashi picked up the phone and walked it back over to Kuroo. “It’s too much of a hassle to get a new one.”

Kuroo sighed but Akaashi wasn’t wrong. He returned to the juvenile conversation that resulted in his juvenile reaction. 

_ Kenma: so...7? _

_ Kenma: hello? _

_ Kenma: *sigh* _

Kuroo laughed at the messages that took place in the 2 minutes it took Akaashi to grab his phone. 

_ Kuroo: 7 is fine. I’ll see you there, Kenma. _

Kuroo pulled on his favorite navy jeans, a plain t-shirt and his favorite dark red sweater that he left unbuttoned. He decided to take part of Oikawa’s advice and show up at 7:15 pm. To say he wasn’t expecting what was waiting for him was an understatement. Kenma wasn’t there. Again. He searched the dark corners of the club to no avail. He remembered the secret restaurant in the back and mentioned it to a bouncer that let him into the backroom. Surprise, surprise! Kenma stood him up. Again.

Kuroo inhaled a deep shaky breath and tried his hardest not to let it get to him. It wasn’t like it was an established relationship and Kenma was his actual boyfriend, ditching him over and over. He didn’t know why it bothered him so much. First dates bailed, it happened. 

“Hey- you doin’ alright?”

Kuroo turned toward a head with short bleached hair, taller and more confident than Kenma. “I’m fine.” Kuroo turned toward the door then felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Wanna stay for a drink?” 

Kuroo gave him a sad smile. “I do but not tonight.”

“Sucks. Here- give me yer hand.” Kuroo held his hand out and the blonde put his number on it using a dark green sharpie. “Atsumu.”

“Kuroo.” 

“Text me sometime, Kuroo. When yer done with the pity party.” Atsumu winked at him. “Yer too cute to look that sad.”

Kuroo chuckled and shook his head lightly. “Thanks.” 

He exited the bar and walked back toward his car, frowning deeply the entire way. He was too busy staring down at the sidewalk to notice the dark sedan rolling its window down just enough to see Kuroo walking away.

Kuroo found another article the next day about someone spotting the famous bleach blonde near a certain drag bar the night before. He scrolled through the article detailing that Kenma never left his car, he sat outside of the bar for an hour before finally leaving.

Kuroo did not throw his phone that time and instead started getting curious about the life that Kenma had. He started doing his research and ended up coming to a conclusion on why this guy had stood him up twice already. There was barely any information on his private life, the only articles were the recent ones of him at the conference, outside of the sushi bar, and the previous night's article from Lips.He pursed his lips as he pulled up his very short text thread with Kenma. He started and stopped writing a text more times than he would ever be willing to admit. He was going to test Kenma one time and then make his decision.

_ Kuroo: so do you actually want to go out with me or no? _

_ Kenma: i do _

_ Kuroo: tonight? _

_ Kenma: ok _

_ Kuroo: ever been to fluxx? _

_ Kenma: yes _

_ Kuroo: meet me there at 9 _

_ Kenma: ok _

Kuroo tossed his phone onto the couch and waited for the hours to pass.

After some whining from Bokuto and Suga about getting his hopes shot down like a bolt of lightning during a storm, Kuroo sat in a dark corner at Fluxx and checked his phone. 9:02 and no sight of Kenma. Kuroo already knew Kenma wasn’t coming. He even heard the expected low hum of gossip spread through the already crowded club that somebody famous was spotted outside. That famous someone had been spotted pulling up to the club and then promptly leaving the club. Kuroo drank a glass and a half of whiskey that he paid too much for then left the club. He leaned against the wall outside of the club, his foot kicked up behind him and pulled his phone out. 

_ Kuroo: meet me here or delete my number. _

Kuroo’s thoughts were confirmed as Kenma read the messages containing the location of his apartment. He knew Bokuto and Akaashi were at Suga’s so they’d be alone.

Kenma knocked hesitantly at Kuroo’s door a half hour later. He started taking steps back seconds after his knuckles moved away from the door.

Kuroo pulled it open slowly so as not to scare the feral seeming cat on his doorstep. “Hello.”

“Hi.” Kenma squeaked out, losing the confidence that let him out of his town car.

“Nobody is home. I made dinner.”

Kenma stepped inside and fiddled with the sleeve of his sweater. “How did you make dinner so fast?”

“Oh I had it in the oven an hour ago.”

“Were you not planning on staying at the club with me?”

“Don’t act like you were planning on actually coming into the club. It’s insulting.” Kuroo responded with less tact than he meant to answer with. He saw Kenma’s eyes drop to the ground and inhaled deeply, exhaling slowly. “Can we talk?”

“Okay.” 

Kuroo moved toward his dining room and the meal he had set up there. He pulled out a chair and Kenma sat after fidgeting a bit more. “So, Kenma. How many more dates were you planning on not showing up to?”

Kenma bit his cheek and looked down at the bowl of rice in front of him. “As many as you’d agree to.”

Kuroo piled some noodles onto his plate and snorted. “Why?”

“I don’t-” Kenma sighed. “I just couldn’t- I didn’t mean to-”

Kuroo held up a hand and Kenma stopped talking. “I’m going to be a dick here and assume some things, starting with your social phobia. I’m going to assume you probably have a panic disorder as well which is why you never even got out of your car.” Kenma held his gaze and Kuroo knew he was right. “Why did you ask me to meet you at such public places?”

Kenma shrugged and looked at his empty glass. Kuroo stood and grabbed a pitcher or water and a glass of wine. Kenma chose the wine and Kuroo grabbed a stemless wine glass. “I thought that was what you would prefer.”

“If it’s going to be such an inconvenience for you then it’s not something I would prefer at all.”

Kenma’s eyes darted toward Kuroo in slight confusion and something that bordered on fondness. “Why?”

“Why would I accept date after date with you, knowing you’d stand me up, and still want to do something that you wouldn’t want to do?”

Kenma pushed grains of rice around, taking small bites in between. “I don’t know.”

Kuroo rolled his eyes. “You like me, right? At least a little bit?”

The corner’s of his eyes pulled up slightly. “A little.”

“Then I’m going to tell you a few things right now. If something makes you uncomfortable, just tell me. We can leave, we can not do it- those are both options. I’ll leave an award ceremony if it means your comfort.” The words tumbled out of Kuroo’s mouth so willingly that he wondered how the hell it came to this with someone he didn’t even know. Kenma had the slightest blush on his face and something about that made Kuroo upset because to him it meant that people hadn’t given him that simple courtesy before. “I don’t really go out. I don’t go clubbing, I don’t drink beer. I like wine, I have a glass or two every couple of nights. This one is a really nice Pinot I’ve been wanting to try. I thought it’d pair well with the salmon. I work a lot, sometimes 6 days a week because I enjoy my job. I like to come home and watch TV and play with my cat.”

Kenma’s eyes fell to the floor as a stark white feline wrapped herself around his leg. She purred loudly as she nuzzled his foot, rolling over onto her back. “You have a cat?”

Kuroo frowned. “Are you allergic-”

“I love cats. I have two.” Kenma pushed his phone toward Kuroo, the background on his lock screen showed two identical black cats. “This is Al and Ed.”

Kuroo snorted at the name, dissolving into cackling laughter. “Check her collar.”

Kenma leaned down and gently reached for her collar. The tag ready  _ Winry _ . Kenma dissolved into soft laughter as he scratched Winry’s head. “Winry.” He breathed the name, laughing again at the coincidence.

“So, this is our first date Kenma. It’s definitely not our last.”

Kenma straightened up and nodded at Kuroo. “Tomorrow too.”


End file.
